Dear friends, this is a brief PSA to inform you that Thai
massage is a strange form of torture. In
the USA I occasionally have money for a massage and treat myself to a Swedish
massage. The cost usually ranges between
$60-75 for 1 hour. This form of massage therapy is soothing. I usually request gentle pressure. I was happy learn about the $10 massages in
Thailand. I vaguely remember an article
in which the writer warned thai massage can be painful. Also in hindsight, I recall a conversation
with a new friend at my yoga retreat village.
She is a massage therapist from the USA who came to Thailand for a few
weeks and spent a couple weeks studying Thai massage. She told me that she was in pain after her
massage. Why oh why didn’t I listen to
these voices?
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| The setting for my painful massage was on this beautiful island. Who would imagine that pain could live here? |
I have been in Thailand for 5 days. I have had 3 massages. All of them have lasted an hour and none have
cost more than $15. The first was an oil massage for about $15. I was told to take off my shirt and pants. I did that and lay on the table. The guy, a small framed Thai man, came into
the room saying, “no, no madame, brazier too.”
He then proceeded to unhook my bra, throw it next to the other clothes,
and start the massage. I noticed that
the massage table is wider than those used back home. This is because the massage therapist gets up
on the table with you. It seems that the
effort of making me relaxed is actually a bit of a workout for them. This therapist was pleasant. Except for a few moments of heavy pressure on
my back, he was soothing and I almost fell asleep on his table. There was a portion at the end where I sat up
so he could massage my neck and shoulders.
I was a bit self conscious sitting up topless, but the room had curtains
protecting me from outsiders view, and this man’s demeanor suggested that he
wasn’t interested in my breast or any other woman’s.
My second massage was the following day at a local outdoor
market. I had walked up and down the
aisles viewing the items that were for sale.
I only purchased a pair of flip flops to switch for my close toed
walking shoes because it was a pretty hot day.
I saw a shop advertising massage and decided to try a foot massage. For $6.80 I was treated to a lovely 1 hour
massage. I fell asleep for about 15
minutes. When I consider the tip that I
left, it was the best $9 I’ve spent so far in this country.
Now the 3rd massage. I have been at a yoga retreat village on the
island of Koh Yao Noi. I started my
first afternoon with a nice yoga class that lasted for about 90 minutes. I’m pretty sure that I either pulled a muscle
or pinched a nerve because I tried to do the moves without “listening to my
body” as the instructor cautioned several times during the class. The next day my body forced me to listen to
it when I awakened to a sharp pain in my lower back that persisted throughout
the day. I went through a 2 hour yoga
class in the morning. The pain made me
modify my moves. I chose table position
instead of downward facing dog. I skipped
all of the fancier poses. If the poses
involved a stretch that was relieving, I stayed there while the class moved
on. I spent a good amount of time in
child’s pose. I decided to skip the
afternoon class and get a massage instead since the pain has me sitting,
standing, and walking like an old woman.
I went to a little place that is only 5 minutes walk from
the yoga village. A woman greeted me and
asked if I wanted a massage. She spoke
English, so I explained that my lower back was hurting and asked if she could
help. I requested an oil massage, assuming
it would be like the experience I had 2 days prior in Bangkok. I think
an oil massage in this village just means a Thai massage with oil. The first 5
minutes let me know this massage would be different than Bangkok. She started
by having me undress down to my panties.
She lowered the panties exposing half of my butt, and tucked in the
sheet. She started applying gentle
pressure to my legs. So far, so good.
Wait a minute. WTH? Is this woman standing
on me? I felt her knees on my
thighs. She was sitting on my thighs
and shifting her weight from right to left.
Then the sitting on Janeen portion of the massage ended and she started
abusing my back. Yes, ABUSING. This
session involved poking her thumbs, elbows, and hands at me, sometimes very
forcefully. The oil that was used on my
back was actually Tiger balm. I
appreciated that considering my soarness.
I was probably only truly relaxed for about 30% of the massage. I could hear a girl moaning next to me. Was that pleasure or pain? She was in pain from her massage. I look back on the experience and laugh. I was shouting, “Ouch” or “that hurts” at
times. The girl next to me was moaning
or crying. We endured the abuse. The elbows poking into our backs. The feeling
of her bone rubbing forcefully against my bone.
Am I really paying for this? My
back better feel better after this abuse.
I left the massage chair super oily and still in pain. I will say that the massage pain distracted
me from the back pain, so it was successful in that respect. I looked like days
of my childhood when my mother would oil me down with Vaseline and I smelled
like an athlete treating a sports injury with my covering of Tiger Balm.
Afterward, I sat and had tea at the adjoining restaurant. The other girl, a woman from The Netherlands,
sat and chatted with me. We bonded over
our torturous experience. She has been
traveling for 8 months. She trekked
though India, Iran, and Nepal. She spent
2 weeks climbing the Himalayas prior to coming to Thailand. She had lots of questions about my life in
Kuwait. I had lots of question about her travel experience. This is one of my treasured joys of
travel. There is an opportunity to meet
extraordinary people you would not meet otherwise. She thought my move to Kuwait was brave. I thought her 8 month solo journey was
brave. I think the bravest thing that
either of us may have ever done was endure a Thai massage!
Additional Note: I had another massage in Phuket about 4 days after writing this post. It was great! My faith in a good massage has been restored.
